Good Friday at Cypress Bowl

What makes a Good Friday good ?

Spending it on snow in the sun wearing only a rugby shirt could be one answer !

Arriving bright and early at Cypress Bowl courtesy of A.D.D’s un-pimped ride and calling Jim who was to make his own way up the conversation went something like this:

Telephone Conversation 1

Garry: ‘We’re here Jim, where are ya’?
Jim: ‘Just pulling into the car park now’
Garry: ‘Good stuff – get your kit on and we’ll see ya by the ticket kiosk’
Jim: ‘Right you are’

15 minutes later………..

Telephone Conversation 2

Garry: ‘Where are you…… are you putting your make up on or what’
Jim: ’Hold your water…. I’m just getting on the gondola….see in a minute’
Garry: ‘Ok’

End of Telephone Conversation 2

Garry to Leigh: ‘Jim is nearly here…..he’s just getting on the Gondola’
Leigh to Garry: ‘There is no gondola at Cypress you !*$#!*!....... he must be at Grouse’
Simon to Garry: ‘Where did you tell him to go then’
Garry to all: ‘He called me while pissed last night in the pub and I said Cypress…. We never ski at Grouse’

Telephone Conversation 3

Garry: ‘Are you at Grouse you numpty’
Jim: ‘Yeah – that’s where you said to go last night while pissed on your voicemail’
Garry: ‘Mate….. you called me from the pub while YOU were pissed and I said Cypress… we never ski at Grouse.... I've never even skied at Grouse’
Jim: ‘By the shite…. ok I’m on my way over’

1 Hour later on the ski hill

All to Jim: ‘Hello big fella – have a nice morning at Grouse’?
Jim: ‘Piss off you lot….. he (pointing to Garry) said Grouse while drunk last night’
Garry: ‘No I didn’t …. You were the one drunk in the battle cruiser’
Leigh: ‘Easy fella’s….. have a cuddle and lets go skiing’

Monday Morning at Work

Jim to Simon: ‘Hello mate….. have a listen to this voicemail will ya left at 9pm Thursday night’

(back ground noise of screeching voices and Barry White on the Juke box)

‘Yeah Jim….. Garry here…. listen mate (hic – burp – hic) some of the boys are going skiing tomorrow if you fancy it (belch – hic)….. (voice muffled by suspected chicken wing in mouth) … the sun will be out so it will be sweet (hic-belch-burp)…. I hear you’re crapper than me so get yourself along…. I could do with looking good for a change (belch belch belch)….. any way if you are up for it see you at GROUSE at nine am’

Click…… end of voicemail

CONCLUSION: Verify at all times twice with Gorgeous George where the rendezvous point is and take independent witness.

CONCLUSION 2: Unless you want to look like a pool cue tipped with red chalk, if you’re bald always wear sun screen on a sunny ski day in Canada.